Laurie Idahosa is a clergywoman who doesn’t shy from talking about relationship issues. sometimes, desperation and insecurity makes people act in ways that will push their partners away instead.

Laurie took to her Instagram page to give a word of advise for the end of year. In her message, Laurie wrote “You may be at a place where you will do whatever it takes to keep your partner, so that you don’t journey into 2021 alone”

Some people treat their partners like they are some kind of property and should be controlled and monitored at all times. On the contrary, that just pushes the controlled person away. They will always want to break free.

What is Larie Idahosa’s message all about?

As the year comes to an end, you may have found yourself being overly obsessed and possessive of your relationship. You may be at a place where you will do whatever it takes to keep your partner, so that you don’t journey into 2021 alone. This desperation may have been making you act in ways that will drive your partner away instead of drawing them in.

One of the best ways to lose a partner’s interest is to hold onto them too closely; to become obsessive and to monitor their moves.

Your relationship is not meant to be a bondage. Don’t treat your partner like your property, your ward or as if you need to control their every action.

If you are obsessing over them, (even if it is just in your mind), you could very well be sabotaging the one thing you want to keep, more than anything in the world.

Learn to trust, to release the pressure and to love unconditionally, without a magnifying glass. You don’t need to see everything in their world.

Maintaining a life and pursuing interests that aren’t being monitored by you in detail is what makes your partner more interesting.

She went on to provide a check list so you can see where you are at any given time.

Here’s a little checklist….

Stop controlling
Stop snooping around
Stop following their every move
Stop spying on their social media, phones, laptops etc.
Stop interrogating
Stop being so needy
Stop being so insecure.

When you ditch these self-destructive behaviors, you are leaving room for them to love you and pursue your love the way they did when you first started.